Flow: Heavy, Mood: Irritable, Cramps: Severe, Backache: Mild

the title of this post is the description of yesterday on iPeriod, my iphone menstrual cycle tracking app… yes, this is the kind of blog in which i will talk openly about my menstrual cycle

yesterday was awful, i had the WORST CRAMPS IN THE WORLD, which is what i say every month on the first day of my cycle and it’s true- there were a few hours in the afternoon when i had to periodically put my head down on my desk the pain was so bad, i really considered going home- i probably should have b/c i was in such a bad mood- usually my worst cramps come in the middle of the night which is like a terrible nightmare, but at least my co-workers aren’t around then for me to be bitchy to- i don’t think i was actually bitchy to anyone but i was grumpy- and there was one point when my coworker asked me to problem-solve something in the database and my brain just wouldn’t function, i actually cried a tiny bit and it was nothing worth crying over… SO DUMB! today hasn’t been great either: Flow: Heavy, Mood: Irritable, Cramps: Medium, Backache: Mild… a little less irritable and the pain wasn’t nauseating but still sucky

so, i didn’t make it to the gym today or yesterday (frowny face) because i was so uncomfortable and there’s no way i’m working out in public with a Heavy Flow but i did go three days this week so i’m calling that a success! and while i didn’t make it to the gym, i did give huck a long walk both days- the walk i like to do, the walk i should do every day, is up broadway to phelps park (which has a beautiful view overlooking the community prairie and the upper iowa) and then back down, around the middle school, and back home- it takes about 25-30 minutes and it’s very enjoyable- and b/c the days are getting longer, i was able to catch the very end of the sunset by the time i got to phelps- ooh aah sunset over the river, sigh

walking huck gives me a chance to catch up on my podcasts- when i first moved here i was so good about walking huck for like an hour every day after work b/c i had so much time b/c my life here hadn’t really started yet- and then when i first moved into my house and was painting and stuff all the time, i listened to podcasts for hours a day- now i usually only listen on walks and long drives and sometimes when i’m puttering around the house- i listen to so many good ones- i won’t list them now, that’s another post altogether- but one of them is radiolab, duh- tonight i listened to a recent radiolab on “loops” and is was so good (duh)- you should listen to it- all i’m gonna say is “whale fall”

i need to always remember to bring my phone with me on walks though- not necessarily to make phone calls, although a walk can be a good time to catch up with friends- but to take notes- i didn’t have it with me yesterday and i had a list of like ten things i was trying to remember by the time i got home, it was getting hard to listen to my podcast- and i also need the phone to take pictures- there is always at least one cool thing to take a picture of on a walk and it’s such a bummer to be without a camera- here are some photos i took tonight:

(hipstamatic seems like such a cheap trick but whatever, sometimes it just gets things so right- that's the entrance to phelps, a little bit of blue sky in the back)

(this one's not hipstamatic, just regular iphone, hipstamatic couldn't get this one- do you see the trees here? the trees are the best part)

it’s been really warm these past couple days- i was so confused when i left the office yesterday b/c the parking lot was all wet but it hadn’t rained, it took me a minute to realize it was b/c all the ice had melted- it also smelled like cow poop… i want it to be crunchy under my feet in january, not muddy- muddy is for springtime

the nice thing about evening walks this time of year is that people still have their christmas lights up- it’s so pretty- part of me wishes people would hang lights on their houses all year but another part of me likes that there’s just a special time of year for it- my christmas lights are still up too:

i’m going to take them down after my friday the 13th party (it’s not a theme btw, it just happens to be on friday the 13th), but i’m thinking of keeping the white lights around the door up forever

ok, so the whole truth about why i didn’t get up to go to the gym the past two days is that in addition to SUFFERING FROM MY PERIOD, i also made the mistake of downloading a free version of the sims on my phone and it’s so dumb, but i find it really enjoyable- so i've been staying up too late... it'll pass... here are two of my sims having sex outside LOL:

BYE!

(one more, it's a posty night) OFFERMAN LOVE

you probably know this b/c i never shut up about it, but if you don't know you should know that i have the hugest crush in the world on NICK OFFERMAN and i imagine that many posts on this blog will be devoted to how sexy and amazing he is- i am going to just ignore the risk that i will probably end up sounding like a crazy person and go forth expressing my love freely and with abandon

here is a picture of the object of my desire that was printed recently in playboy magazine- enjoy!

omgomgomg

wallets

my little brother made me this badass duct tape wallet for xmas, i really wish it was big enough to hold bills b/c i actually need a new wallet ♥

but since its incredible dearness does not alas make it functional, i have my eye on this instead:

 

what it lacks in heart, it makes up for in functionality and beauty- look, it holds your iphone! 

caaaaaauuuuuuuuccccuuuuusssss!

just back from cock-assing! (i've been restraining myself from making that joke on facebook, good thing i have a blog!) it was a wonderful experience... there were no candidates to vote on for the democrats this year, so after electing delegates* to the county convention and such, we discussed and voted on platform resolutions- this was the really wonderful part, to hear my friends and neighbors put forth thoughtful and important resolutions, to actively support them with a hardy "yes!"... there are good people doing good things, don't forget it! i myself did not put forth a resolution tonight- i wasn't exactly sure what i was in for and when it comes to things like this, i am shy unless i've done some work and thinking on my own beforehand (which i did not), but there are other opportunities as the process continues to put forth resolutions and i may do so...

for some dumb reason though, i did not have any lip balm in my pockets tonight so that was uncomfortable

btw- i went to the gym again this morning! but i did have culver's for dinner... baby steps!

*i will be one- there were other positions that needed to be filled as well, be these required more of a commitment of time and energy- there was a little bit of very kindly arm-twisting done to fill these and i felt a little guilty not raising my hand (especially b/c there was a push for the younger participants especially to volunteer)- but i was serious about my resolution not to take on new commitments (of course there will be some, but i have to be thoughtful about them and i can't say "yes" to everything)... i already feel a little stretched thin in honoring the commitments i have already established... taking on too much makes you not much good at anything, and not very happy

a good day

a quick post b/c i'm just returning from a potluck and it's almost time for lights out

an amazing potluck in a beautiful home (two log cabins smacked together), good people, delicious food of course (decorah rules potlucks), and i learned my new favorite game, it's called PICTIONARY TELEPHONE and i'm going to bring it to all my friends (all you need is paper and pencils and you will laugh a lot), and i had some wine, and i made domestic goddess brownies and everyone loved them and i made new friends

and there is still not enough snow but even though it was insanely windy and cold today i am happy for it because it feels like winter, as it should, and on the drive home the car lights made everything sparkle

AND i am proud of myself b/c i did get up and go to the gym at 6am this morning- well, 6:20... i did lie in bed and contemplate it for a while but i really want to be proud of myself so i got up and it wasn't terrible- and huck got a longer than usual walk this afternoon- but i didn't have a very good breakfast b/c i really need to go grocery shopping... but the point was not to make all these changes at once, the point is to set big goals and make at least a little bit of progress every day, to work towards establishing new habits

i wish i could take a day off and clean my house, just sayin

new year's day

one of the problems with the new year is that you have these ideas that you will wake up on new year’s day feeling productive and motivated to start making the changes you set for yourself, but the truth is, you drank a lot of champagne on new year’s eve, so you’re too hung over to do much except stay in bed and catch up on “work of art”

but, you can’t be too hard on yourself because it is important to celebrate… and it’s important to have relaxing days on which you sleep until noon and go to a friend’s house to eat black-eyed peas & collards* and knit and play dominoes (and huck got to spend some time with his bff penny)

however, i am disappointed that i missed the silent service at church this morning, but they aren’t kidding about champagne headaches- ouch

last night turned out to be a really good new year’s eve… i was having a hard time rallying, despite the fact that two wonderful friends of mine hosted a lovely party with delicious snacks and rosemary martinis… despite the fact that i was wearing silver leggings and my awesome plastic charm necklace… still, i was headed towards my usual new year's blues until (at a second party now, a more intimate one), we started a living room dance party ten minutes before midnight… we danced in the new year, passing around the champagne bottle… and there were party poppers with confetti and i wasn’t sad at all

so i’m feeling good and grateful for my friends here in iowa… but also wishing that i had been able to dive into the icy atlantic this morning with katy & danielle… sigh, you can’t have it all

and i was even a little productive tonight and it looks like i’ll have the lights out by 11, go me! it’ll be interesting to see if i can actually make myself get up at 6 tomorrow… discipline!

*apparently this is a traditional southern meal for new year’s day- the black-eyed peas are supposed to bring you luck and the collards are supposed to bring you money… although i think we actually ate kale… there was ham in there too… and we also ate pizza… and chocolate ice cream on pancakes